Troy's had over 100 messages on Dogpages and over 50 on Facebook! He was loved by everyone.
The Dogpages messages: http://www.dogpages.org.uk/forums/index.php?showtopic=236132
The Facebook messages: http://www.facebook.com/vera.marney#!/photo.php?fbid=482758748519&set=a.92448458519.87096.537178519&comments
I love you so much, big boy, and I miss you with all my heart!
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Troy's ashes are home
Over the last few days I have had so many lovely messages! I didn't realise Troy had this many friends. Don't quite know why I am surprised though...
I brought Troy's ashes home today and it's good to have him back. The house is very empty without him and I feel quite lost without having to look after him, but remembering all the lovely times I had with him helps. I keep looking at the picture of Troy on a lovely card that Pat made me; I just miss him so much!
Today I went to hydrotherapy with Dylan like I have every Saturday for the last three months, and I saw four white doves when I parked my car, which I have never seen there before. In fact I don't think I have ever seen white doves in the wild ever in my life before. I wonder whether Troy was saying hi and telling me that he was fine and at peace! I like to think so.
I brought Troy's ashes home today and it's good to have him back. The house is very empty without him and I feel quite lost without having to look after him, but remembering all the lovely times I had with him helps. I keep looking at the picture of Troy on a lovely card that Pat made me; I just miss him so much!
Today I went to hydrotherapy with Dylan like I have every Saturday for the last three months, and I saw four white doves when I parked my car, which I have never seen there before. In fact I don't think I have ever seen white doves in the wild ever in my life before. I wonder whether Troy was saying hi and telling me that he was fine and at peace! I like to think so.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Cremation and the reality of Troy's death
This morning, Cornel came over, and also my friend Dave to help move Troy's body into Cornel's car; just as well, Troy was very heavy indeed.
We then drove to the Pet Crematorium, where Troy was laid into a little hutch with flowers - it was really lovely! We spent a few minutes with him and told him how much we loved him.
We then chose a picture casquet to put his ashes in which I will pick up from Mark's on Saturday.
When I got home, I had to hoover and clean the carpets particularly where Troy was laying. Once it was all done, I suddenly felt kind of lost as there was nothing to do for Troy anymore. I have been doing so much washing and cleaning for him over the last few weeks and I have been constantly tending to him helping him in and out of the garden, making sure he was comfortable etc that now there is nothing to do, it feels too quiet and empty. The house feels too large with no big furry lump to climb over or blocking the view of the TV... LOL
I miss Troy terribly and it's only now that we have actually sent him off and he is completely gone from the house that it's starting to sink in what's actually happened; and it's only now that I am starting to realise that I will never see him again - well, not in this life anyway! And this scares me.
We then drove to the Pet Crematorium, where Troy was laid into a little hutch with flowers - it was really lovely! We spent a few minutes with him and told him how much we loved him.
We then chose a picture casquet to put his ashes in which I will pick up from Mark's on Saturday.
When I got home, I had to hoover and clean the carpets particularly where Troy was laying. Once it was all done, I suddenly felt kind of lost as there was nothing to do for Troy anymore. I have been doing so much washing and cleaning for him over the last few weeks and I have been constantly tending to him helping him in and out of the garden, making sure he was comfortable etc that now there is nothing to do, it feels too quiet and empty. The house feels too large with no big furry lump to climb over or blocking the view of the TV... LOL
I miss Troy terribly and it's only now that we have actually sent him off and he is completely gone from the house that it's starting to sink in what's actually happened; and it's only now that I am starting to realise that I will never see him again - well, not in this life anyway! And this scares me.
Monday, January 3, 2011
TROY 22/11/1999 - 03/01/2011
Troy's gone to sleep forever!
After I wrote the last blog post, I gave Troy one of the big biscuits he loves so much and he ate it. After that he ate quite a bit of chicken too.
When in the morning, he seemed so much better, I was pleased that he managed to turn the corner again and was happy that we had a bit longer together. He could get up again and he walked ok again.
However, towards the evening he got worse again. I ended up helping him in and out of the garden probably about hourly and his control of his legs got progressively worse until I had to support both his front and back end and he collapsed a few times in the garden and indoors.
He eventually settled in the sitting room, I slept downstairs again like the night before. Towards the morning, he started fidgeting a bit and then I realised that he couldn't actually get up at all. I tried to help him, but he was too weak. He couldn't even lift his front end and stay in an upright position (whilst still laying down).
He wouldn't eat or drink either and he had messed himself. I then called Cornel who came over. And my vet Ian arrived just after 11 am. Ian checked him over and also came to the conclusion that Troy was unlikely to recover, that he had two conditions whose treatments were incompatible (NSAIDs for very painful spine pain and steroids for liver) and that the spine is not transmitting the nerve signals anymore as Troy often walked on his knuckles now on his hind legs. He also said that Mark left a note on his file about how bad Troy was. After explaining it all, Cornel and I decided to let Troy go as he was unlikely to get better and his quality of life just wasn't there anymore! His body was failing him, his joints painful, his backlegs with virtually no feeling, failing eyesight, liver problems and muscle was wasting away so rapidly and mercilessly.
When Ian gave the injection, Cornel and I were cuddling Troy and literally within seconds Troy had gone. It was very peaceful, he literally just went to sleep without the slightest hesitation it seemed. His body was so weak and Troy was ready to leave this world for the Rainbow Bridge.
I am heart broken, and although Troy's body is still here (I wanted to keep him here for one night as it helps me to come to terms with things and gives me some kind of closure), it is very uncomfortable not to hear his breathing, his loud and powerful bark and his big head on my lap.
I have made arrangements with the pet crematorium in East Grinstead and Cornel and I are taking him there tomorrow morning for the cremation. I will then pick the casquet up from Mark's at the end of the week.
Dylan, Flash and Jesse are coping with this so well. They were there when it all happened, but because it was so peaceful, they didn't get unsettled at all. I think they knew what was happening. They haven't once gone to sniff Troy's body, not even Dylan that was sniffing him quite a lot lately.
Yesterday morning, I got a fab opportunity for a wonderful picture of all my four boys together, which turned out to be the last picture like that. I also got a few of Troy - again, the last ones I have of him now and they do show how tired he was really!
I miss you so much Troy. You were the best; a dog in a million! I will always love you.
After I wrote the last blog post, I gave Troy one of the big biscuits he loves so much and he ate it. After that he ate quite a bit of chicken too.
When in the morning, he seemed so much better, I was pleased that he managed to turn the corner again and was happy that we had a bit longer together. He could get up again and he walked ok again.
However, towards the evening he got worse again. I ended up helping him in and out of the garden probably about hourly and his control of his legs got progressively worse until I had to support both his front and back end and he collapsed a few times in the garden and indoors.
He eventually settled in the sitting room, I slept downstairs again like the night before. Towards the morning, he started fidgeting a bit and then I realised that he couldn't actually get up at all. I tried to help him, but he was too weak. He couldn't even lift his front end and stay in an upright position (whilst still laying down).
He wouldn't eat or drink either and he had messed himself. I then called Cornel who came over. And my vet Ian arrived just after 11 am. Ian checked him over and also came to the conclusion that Troy was unlikely to recover, that he had two conditions whose treatments were incompatible (NSAIDs for very painful spine pain and steroids for liver) and that the spine is not transmitting the nerve signals anymore as Troy often walked on his knuckles now on his hind legs. He also said that Mark left a note on his file about how bad Troy was. After explaining it all, Cornel and I decided to let Troy go as he was unlikely to get better and his quality of life just wasn't there anymore! His body was failing him, his joints painful, his backlegs with virtually no feeling, failing eyesight, liver problems and muscle was wasting away so rapidly and mercilessly.
When Ian gave the injection, Cornel and I were cuddling Troy and literally within seconds Troy had gone. It was very peaceful, he literally just went to sleep without the slightest hesitation it seemed. His body was so weak and Troy was ready to leave this world for the Rainbow Bridge.
I am heart broken, and although Troy's body is still here (I wanted to keep him here for one night as it helps me to come to terms with things and gives me some kind of closure), it is very uncomfortable not to hear his breathing, his loud and powerful bark and his big head on my lap.
I have made arrangements with the pet crematorium in East Grinstead and Cornel and I are taking him there tomorrow morning for the cremation. I will then pick the casquet up from Mark's at the end of the week.
Dylan, Flash and Jesse are coping with this so well. They were there when it all happened, but because it was so peaceful, they didn't get unsettled at all. I think they knew what was happening. They haven't once gone to sniff Troy's body, not even Dylan that was sniffing him quite a lot lately.
Yesterday morning, I got a fab opportunity for a wonderful picture of all my four boys together, which turned out to be the last picture like that. I also got a few of Troy - again, the last ones I have of him now and they do show how tired he was really!
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Troy's not well now
On Thursday night, Troy looked like he wanted to go for a walk, so I took him by car to the Country Park. He first didn't want to jump into the car, but did so when I asked him. The walk itself wasn't good as Troy stopped a lot, did't know where he wanted to go and was quite wobbly all the way around. I knew that this was probably the last walk.
Over the last few days, he got more wobbly and yesterday and today he has started to refuse food again. He ate half his breakfast this morning, a couple of licks of his lunch... so I went and got some chicken breast and cooked it. So he ate a pound of warm cooked chicken with lots of gusto.
In the evening, I took the other boys for a walk and when I came home Troy was laying down in the same position I left him, but he'd pood. He either couldn't, didn't want to or didn't know he had to get up... I suspect he oculdn't get up as I had to help him later when he couldn't lift his backend up to go for a wee.
Since then, he hasn't moved and I just tried to give him some chicken again and although he took one piece after a lot of persuasion he is refusing to eat more now!
I think we are reaching the end of the road now... he looks tired and his eyes are almost always closed now! I will sleep downstairs tonight and tell Cornel tomorrow to come and see him. My heart is breaking...
Over the last few days, he got more wobbly and yesterday and today he has started to refuse food again. He ate half his breakfast this morning, a couple of licks of his lunch... so I went and got some chicken breast and cooked it. So he ate a pound of warm cooked chicken with lots of gusto.
In the evening, I took the other boys for a walk and when I came home Troy was laying down in the same position I left him, but he'd pood. He either couldn't, didn't want to or didn't know he had to get up... I suspect he oculdn't get up as I had to help him later when he couldn't lift his backend up to go for a wee.
Since then, he hasn't moved and I just tried to give him some chicken again and although he took one piece after a lot of persuasion he is refusing to eat more now!
I think we are reaching the end of the road now... he looks tired and his eyes are almost always closed now! I will sleep downstairs tonight and tell Cornel tomorrow to come and see him. My heart is breaking...
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